Heartbeat

by Lioness   Oct 24, 2011


Give me your darkened stethoscope doc
so I can hear the trumpets blow,

They're singing to me with sarcasm
while disdain begins to flow

Oh how I long to trust the thoughts
expelling from minds unlike my own,

Catastrophically abiding my breath
like a lily forced to grow

My heart may be driving this blood inside
contained by my veins so thin,

With each thump, I am kept awake
this sound abruptly deafening

Unwillingly, this distinct shell of mine
tries to shield me from all things grim,

I fight like a lion in Africa's warmth
nonetheless I never win

~ Liz ~

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Latest Comments

  • 13 years ago

    by A lonely soul

    Well penned mixture of feelings. Somewhat difficult to interpret in some places. Yes, each stanza is loaded with metaphorical emotions. 5/5

    Just wondering whether you meant Lion or Lioness in this last stanza:

    I fight like a lion in Africa's warmth
    nonetheless I never win

    Lions are inherently lazy, they rarely chase and kill. The lionesses are the ones who have the stealth the agility and the fierceness of the breed. So if you really want to make an impact here, you have to change it to Lioness, your own screen name. :)

  • 13 years ago

    by Jenna Bella Oldridge

    This poem made me think wow! I completely loved this poem from start to end. I could find no faults in this piece it was perfect.

    "Oh how I log to trust the thoughts
    expelling from minds unlike my own"

    ^ my favorite stanza :D

    5/5

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