Such a powerful piece! I could feel the despair in every line. The flow is perfection!!!

Well done!!!

Jenn,*

I like the intro, the idea of silence speaking louder than words is a common phrase but you gave it power here with your tone.

"for it just smudges anyway"

I'd remove the "for" in this line, I feel it was a word not needed as the flow sounded better without it.

"mendacious" I love this word! Nice use of it.

"what about guilty until proven innocent?"

I also really liked how you reversed the question here, it gave the audience something to think about and it's true, what about it? I feel like this is something we do often though. We don't use the phrase but we show people as guilty until they're proven innocent, we assume and we gossip and it creates a false idea.

You ended this piece was a strong conclusion, it was a statement and I liked it.

I think what I liked most about this piece was the way it made the audience think about consequences of actions, at least it did for me anyway.

Mel