Comments : Drunken Lullabies

  • 12 years ago

    by BlueJay

    Wow! This piece is so wonderful and everything fits together so perfectly. I totally see the imagery and the cool description, and I'm sorry that anyone would feel this way, or even be able to create such a fabulous piece. 5/5 for sure and you defiantly have talent, I love this piece and hope to see more from you soon. Excellent job, and it's great. You have penned a piece very close to perfection.

  • 12 years ago

    by PinkyPrincess

    Wow this poem is amazing... a very well-deserved win! Congratulations :)
    I love the title - it was so interesting and after reading the poem I saw the relevance. I love the way you painted this story, and the imagery you created. It really moved me.

    "Midnight's the most delicate of times,
    where even the devil can raise his hand for a glass of water.
    A lullaby setting that's pure in form and angelic in nature;
    we are the fiction that we chew."

    >> I really felt this stanza, especially since the devil and evil usually lurks around at night time, so it was perfectly chosen. And I love the line "we are the fiction that we chew" .. wow!

    "Must we starve on crumbs from long ago,
    to break our sorry past?
    Must we use our fears to guide us,
    like a sculptor uses hands?
    Must we swim to the end of the ocean,
    just to see if there's any hope of another existence?"

    >> this was a favorite stanza for me, and I like how it's so strong. The opening two lines in this stanza blew me away, it was just very well-written and had a lot of meaning.

    I loved this line "Must we swim to the end of the ocean,
    just to see if there's any hope of another existence?" >> I like the idea of moving and changing your life, just to see what happens... and if there's something better out there.

    The ending was brilliant as well! Amazing poem and I really enjoyed it. Great job! =D

  • 12 years ago

    by Meena Krish

    An interesting poem with and interesting title and each verse paints a picture for the mind to watch rather then to read and understand..enjoyed the read and congratulations on the win :)

  • 12 years ago

    by Yakari Gabriel

    "Midnight's the most delicate of times, where even
    the devil can raise his hand for a glass of water."
    ^
    BRILLIANT.

    I don't know where to start, explaining all the things I want to say about this piece it is so refreshing,this writer plays with her words so so so good, it is unbelievable.

    by matching the most unusual things with each other..
    "unripe earth."
    "brittle skin"
    "callow eyes"

    this write has a high level of creativity, and although it is in the friendship section it could be interpreted in so many levels.. I was hooked from the beginning, and props to the people who nominated this Jewel,what fine taste.

  • 12 years ago

    by Clown

    This was pretty good, the tittle actually took me back to a month ago when I was river dancing to some good flogging molly, so I wanted to check it out. Im not much of a critic in terms of gramer and spelling but I have a strong touch to the alcholic nature of the poem, liquor was once a wonderful friend who stabed me in the back. anyways, beautiful poem!