Soul Finder

The smoke escapes from my lips as does my soul

I feel my life is fading away as so the world

I see the smoke form a shape that I wish I could feel

It disappears in the moonlight sky

Each step of the breaking of leaves feels like the breaking of my heart

If I even have a heart anymore, are we honestly born with one

Are we honestly born with a soul

Looking down at the cuts resembling my pain across my arms

I see the word that I wish I could be craved deep in my wrist

I stop in front of a river flowing so calm as I wish my life would

Throwing a rock breaking the balence of the calmness

As the calmness of my world has been so many times

When the calmness began again so did my breathing

Another puff of smoke releases from my mouth

I stop to hear what this person they call God has suppooseably created

Sitting there in nature normally calms a forgotten person like myself

But this time it doesn't, why I wonder as I see deer and rabbits grazing

They are so peaceful creatures so sweet in nature

But just like everything else things change people change

I can see myself being them having to fight againt my predators; my demons

The deer finally notices my stares and is strunk in fear as if I was going to kill

Our eyes are locked I can see that this creature has a soul but it sees nothing in return

Watching it finally run off; it feels as if it is taking me with him

I feel the air across my cheeks and matching it chest beats as it trys to disappear from view

My soul floats next to me as if it is taunting me saying I will not come back

Falling off the cliff, the deer it did not think clearly, plumbing to its death I feel as if I done the same

(c) Brittany Michelle