Comments : Locked Up in My Mind

  • 12 years ago

    by ArtistrySoul

    A really nice short poem you have written :)

    Its difficult to interpret this piece because it gives me the sense that your either keeping the person you love stored in your mind or your just missing someone when there not with you, in terms of not messaging or speaking to via you video chat, so i'm guessing this is someone you share your days with online.

    Well done!
    5/5

  • 12 years ago

    by OutCastxKippy

    Wonderful 5/5 ^^

  • 7 years ago

    by Em

    Pia, this is so sweet and honest. Then rhyme, flow and words are all perfectly executed which makes for a smooth flow especially when read aloud. A true long distance/internet romantic piece which some of us can relate well this was my view anyway. So I can comment fully on this will divide this into 3 parts (4 lines each)

    1/ Love, love, love this!!! You would pretty much do anything for them.

    2/ Beautiful. So sweet and I sense there's a time difference so if you slept they'd be awake therefore you'd stay awake unless otherwise you'd be like ships in the night and you also want them to know that you are there for them whatever time of day because they mean alot to you.

    3/ This is such a sweet ending and one that makes me go awwww inside because you truly want it to work (if it's literal) and I truly hope it does or did with the submission of the piece lol. I'm an hopeless romantic after all. You keep their t-shirt to feel close to them be able to smell them and feel them because that shirt was a part of them once, the picture is there so you can remember the times even if short you spent with then and no doubt cannot wait for the next time you can rendezvous with them bit want then to know that all though there's distance they are always on your mind. Sweet and superbly done

    Em