I never thought the days
all my friends would
become mothers
would arrive so soon..
---- True, its strange yet refreshing to see our friends as mothers. For some its earlier than for others but either case, its still surprising to see teenagers as mothers.
in my mind,
I always pictured us..breathing,
inhaling the scent of our youth
in clubs,on the beach..
---- I liked the sentence " inhaling the scent of our youth." This stanza tells me that the author never gave it a thought of what lies beyond being young and that the actions that are taken on our younger days can makes us grow up faster and skip them.
although,
I'm sure none of them
regret the diaper bags,
I still think,
their breasts should have gotten full
with time and not milk..
--- Even though, the author is sure that her friends don't regret having their baby's, the poetess still believes that it was too early for them to have them.
it was only,
when all my friends became mothers,
that I came to realize
that friendships often
end leaving you thirsty
on a place where there is no more water.
--- hmm this stanza intrigues me, I would have expected to see that she realize that time has elapse for them rather than the friendship left her thirsty when her friends became mothers. So my thinking is that her friends no longer have the time for themselves due to being mothers and thus they can't go out and have fun. So the water for her was the time and the fun they had before all of them together.
I never knew
the make over days
full of girl talk would
lose meaning so early..
and all that would be left in my arms,
would be;
my friends,their children and the dreams
of all those dancing nights,
they didn't get to have.
---And there was a change in this stanza..
Make over days full of girl talk instead of Pokemon days.
I enjoyed both. The Pokemon days was great because It brought back good memories as I was reading that part. It made realize that the authors friends became mothers in an early age and thus couldn't make their dreams come true.
As for make over days full of girl talk .. I'm picturing 16 years old that indeed dreams of dancing at nights. But this doesn't bring much impact to me as the pokemon days because pokemon days where more for a 8-9 year old who at some point wonder what they will be doing when they get older, and who somehow looks at 16 years or 18 years old as being the big deal.
time passed by like the old pain
the mind no longer recalls feeling.
----Too much time has already pass just similar to the time it needs for our mind to forget about the pain.
and it was within
those nights that
like my friends,
were expecting
the future- ¨
that I concluded
that not everything
is meant to last...
and that some hopes
will always be nothing
more than vain expectations that
slowly thin with every sunrise..
--- In here, the author concluded that not even being young last even if they are still young because her friends had to grow up with their young age in order to take care of their kids.
True, not everything is meant to last.
But hopes don't always go in vain, that's why I like how the poetess in corporate it " that SOME hopes", meaning not all go in vain.
if we keep hoping and having faith things turn out for the better. As for your friends, they can still fulfill their dream of going dancing when their kids get older or at least attempt it once to get over that unfulfilled dream.
And just like your title " Forever Young," our hopes and goals should just be like that. They should live or exist for only a short time to keep in order to keep getting new ones. Achieve our goals and later get new ones, and the same with hope. Well written.
12 years ago
by Britt
"I still think,
their breast should have gotten full
with time and not milk.."
Should breast be breasts? I like this part, it shows a great analogy to maturity and makes me think of teenagers getting pregnant much too early, while it's hard, it's still a blessing to create life.
I don't care for the pokeman part of the poem, I feel everything written was full of so much maturity, and the pokeman part felt kind of out of place. Maybe 'too' childish, where the rest of the poem felt like teenagers going out, partying, living life ont he edge. Pokeman makes me think of my 8 year old cousin, and he does not belong in clubs. ;)
I like that ending, had great imagery and was a very strong close, always full of your wisdom :) You have a knack, Yaki!