Together This Is A Mission

by CathyButterflyJC   Jan 29, 2012


Together This Is a Mission

You light it up and I know I should look away,
But I know I have to see this,
So I can understand why I need to help,
Why I cry and why I can't give up.

The smoke I can see now and almost smell,
The distance doesn't matter the scene is too strong
It burns inside of me like I am right next to you.

Why do you love it so much?

Why is it so strong?

You can do so much better,
This isn't how it's meant to be,
Why can't you see that?

Why can't you imagine it?

You're older and wiser,
But you still can't see,
That there is a way to quit
The loneliness it's coursed you,
Soon your hair's falling out,
After the news that your diganced with something I've dreaded,
You'll die soon they tell you,
You can't fight it forever, the docters explain,
You can't fight it much longer.

It has shortened your life,
Like I knew it would too.

And you look at me with those big sad eyes,
And now you see why I cried.

You finally see why,
You understand more what I feel inside,
Why I would beat myself up inside,
When you wouldn't listen, and it felt like there was nothing I could do,
What I've always felt within,
Something takes me back to the present,
Away from my thoughts of the future.

Back to the world where I care about you so much and I don't want to see that happen to you, but I know it has the will, the will you won't try to fight.

I care about what happens to you
Not just because you're a friend,
Not only because I've known you close to forever,
Or because we've grown up together,
Or because we live around the corner from each other.

But because you're a person,
And has made a mistake,
A person that stands like everyone else.

I care about what happens to your life.
Maybe because of your smile
Maybe that you won't hit a girl when she gets on your nerves

So when I see after school the steps to when it's being done and done
The pack pulled out
The lighter coming out
You bend over
A fire is lite and quickly disappears again
The smoke comes out
The white stick stands like a rocket so close to take off
Sitting on your lips
Chalking your lungs
Shutting them down
Leading to the end of your life

That is why I cry
Scared you won't listen
And scared to talk about it
But I know I have to
The butterflies are stronger now, like they always get
It's scaring me to death
I never thought that you would smoke
But I can't give up
So that is why I try
And I will never stop.

You say I can't help
You keep on saying no
Stop saying there is no use
I don't want to cry, but it's getting so hard as we talk
I don't know if you've heard it
The misery in my tone
You try to explain why it'd never work
But you don't know you make me cry myself to sleep at night

There's no point in even trying
Others have tried, you spoke
I begged you to let me help, but you kept telling me the two lettered word, no

People die from smoking every day I pleaded
I don't want you to die young, my voice raised
But you just pushed me away, like I dreaded
You claimed that would never happen to you

You clamed you would quit by yourself

So I asked you to call if you needed help
Doubting, but hoping it would happen
I silently promised him and myself I would never give up

You've heard the stories
But you have fright the truth
You have hurt yourself too unknowingly
Have stomped on the hearts of those who have tried to help you

But for me it's not dead yet
Not gone with the wind
I'm not done yet
The dream's still standing

The tears leave wet lines down my cheeks
Leading into my mouth, and my mouth becomes salty

I want to always be able to play sports by your side
To feel my feet on the court and in the mud
I want to always see your smiling face
I want to know you'll be here for a long time
I want to have the memories of you
Forever and always

So please don't let me die inside when I see you light up a cigarette
And please don't tell me there's no use
'Cause your life is worth it

One day I'll see you and look you into your eyes
But I won't turn away to hid
Because I want you to see why I cry

This isn't just a project I dreamed up one night
You mean something to me
And I know I can't give up

I wish you could see how much this means to me
I want you to know that it's hurting me, putting into me misery

Time now is similar to how it use to be
I don't know much about you
But I want to

We can stand together
This is a mission

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Latest Comments

  • 10 years ago

    by Beautiful Soul

    Kaitlyn- I really like this because a lot of people can relate to it. I think though my one nitpick always is the length. You always seem to ramble on in all of your poems and I think you can get to the point sooner. I don't hate it but I think that's something you can work on. But for the poem it self. I like it because a lot of people go through this. This person is/was very close to you. The imagery in the piece is very lovely. The character has so much hope and I love it. I think whenever a you in general get close to a person you want to help them with everything. So the love shines through here. There are two different view points at times here. The character who I assume is you and thesmoker. It seems like you made the ppersons only happiness in smoking and addiction is very hard to break. Overall there is love and hope through out and I loved that. The only thing I didn't love was the title. It doesn't really have a lot to do with the poem imo. But otherwise. Great.

  • 11 years ago

    by Sidh Swabhav

    Reading your poems is like watching a movie of your life.

  • I can relate to this so much!

    I love how you've made it your mission to help this person and to care about their life even when they dont and they push you away themselves for trying.

    You have expressed yourself perfectly and hopefully one day (soon) they'll finally listen and realise that you were right all along.

    Great to see you standing up for something you believe so strongly about.

    5/5

  • 12 years ago

    by PETER EDWARDS

    What raw emotion comes bounding out at you from this poem!
    What great words come exploding outwards from this screen!
    I am in awe of this heartfelt, awesome poem.
    Just got to read it again. Thankyou.

    The message is on the wall for all smokers.
    Ignore this poem at your peril..

  • 12 years ago

    by Autuumnbree

    I can totally relate this is a very hard thing to deal with when someone you love uses cigarettes or street drug to cope. The end is always the same painful for them and those who care about them. Great expressions