If Only For The Children(The Beautyful One Is Not Yet Born).

Ah! I can see it clearly
The battle of the weak and unstrong.
Oh, I feel it deeply
What the man wrestles with deep in his soul.
He is pressed in on all sides
Crushed by the weight of the choice he has to make.
He could, by himself, endure the weakness;
Trudge on and live throughthe passionless Passion Weeks
but then the Loved Ones, the children.
His Oyo`s eyes telling him he is not on his own,
the children`s averted gazes telling him they deserve better,
Mother-in-law`s snickers andsharp remarks
pushing him to redeem himself from the clutches of uselessness.
The Gleam beckons to him but he doesn`t see it clearly
but then the Loved Ones, the wife
points his attention to it and makes sure he doesn`t
ever lose sight of it.
The Gleam is very bright now,
yes it is, but the way to it is shrouded in darkness;
deliberate darkness of the soul.
He has to sell his soul, whichisn`t really alive,
if only for the children.
He has to live without conscience
if only to be able to get his boy shoes to wear
so that his feet don`t get `torn to pieces`.
He has to grow a paunch and live like a White Man`s Imitator
if only so that Adoley and Deedee might
have pretty dresses to wear, just like Princess;
So that they can have enough fish to eat
with more than a small size of kenkey.
If only for the children.
But then The Wife also.
The Wife can also get what she wants;
the ashtrays that look beautiful even if
they are never used.
A radio from Germany and adining room
that looks beautiful even without furniture.
To be able to say that local beer
`does not agree with my constitution`
and develop spftness in the hands even if
it doesn`t reach her eyes.
All these The Gleam brings.
Even the man would have a cleaner bathroom.
a toilet that is not a latrine and Mother-in-law`s smiles.
He doesn`t really mind not having them
but the Loved Ones want them.
So now he has to take the great jump into
the glittering lifeless abyss and become soulless
If only for the children.