My life now

I wake up and open my eyes,
Ready to live a day in lies.

I paint the smile upon my face,
And look like everything's in place

I walk around throughout my day,
Already knowing what I'm going to say.

Finally when I get home I can finally be me,
Instead of the "perfect" girl they see.

At home I don't have to be fake,
And I can cry with the cuts I make.

I feel the blood flow out of my skin,
And I think about how my life has been.

I re-live moments I'd rather forget,
And remember some things that I regret.

Then I clean up the mess I made,
And see te scars that will never fade.

Sometimes I feel my life slipping through my hand,
Flowing down like grains of sand.

I see my life as it's torn,
I feel the eyes as they scorn.

I heard the words that are said,
The ones that say they want me dead.

I do not want pain anymore,
I just want someone to save my heart for.