The Substitute

Oh my god!! I cannot believe what I am reading, this is the most amazing poem I have read, I aint exaggerating.
I can really relate to this, which is why I am in such a mess, this piece blew me away.

Perhaps he can,
so I'll dig in a little
deeper while thinking that
next time instead of
my nails,

I may even try to use
a real blade.
^^^^^^^^
OH, YES, This piece was the deepness of the poem, you really are exeptional.
There is so much I want to say and right now I just can't seem to, but I'll be back.

Love
xxx

Omg... you have no idea how sad and raw this poem is... and how much it touched me.

I could actually relate in some ways. I've never done anything seriously, but I have tried scratching my thighs in fury (but I never got a scratch or anything)..

But especially in the ending... it was really heartbreaking...

because sometimes we're so upset and we do things that we later regret.. And I think many people can relate to this.

I love the beginning:

I need to intercept my own thoughts,
just so I don't break down in front
of this complete stranger...

but

taking a simple breath
doesn't seem to work.

>> It's so true!!! Everyone can relate to this... I know when I am feeling down and I'm around strangers, the last thing I want to do is cry in front of them! It's so hard to control yourself and pretend to be happy and normal!

This poem was filled with raw emotions...

Great job hon! PS I hope this isn't true. If so, be careful darling and try to release your anger/sadness in healthier ways!! *hugs*

Oh lizzie, what do we have here!!

A poem, that everyone can relate to...or think they do.
Or, a poem, that no body can really understand
as much as it's owner. Because it's written from the
very core of your uncomfortable emotions..
tiresome...sadness.
I always say,we owe it to our misery, when
we write such an amazing piece! like this one..
simple, yet deep.

I need to intercept my own thoughts,
just so I don't break down in front
of this complete stranger...
^
I love this, so very direct and hits the nail on the head.
sets up the mood for the reader, this is me, this is
who i am going to be in this poem, but you aught to
read more to know if i will actually break down or not!

WISE writer..

but

^
the but.."or not" "or yes":]..that''s what im talking about.

taking a simple breath
doesn't seem to work.
^
nope, unless, it w very very deep,
when you close your eyes, and shut them
along with the thoughts penetrating :]

Instead I dig my nails in my right thigh,
and just for a moment
the thoughts are washed away -
then the pain sinks in,
^

Confession, I feel as tho this is a part of the memories I have
in my head, I used to stress a lot, and when i felt as tho
i am about to explode, I too took the same step as this
persona in your poem. Very moving

and it feels like a blessing.
^
a bitter one..painful one ..

I wonder why
I'd never done this
before.
^
because it's inevitable, the pain..is urself, and the cure...is in urself.
humans body heart and mind..and all in paradox..liz :]

Hiding behind these
shades of red, could he
see the reflection
of my puffed eyes
and quivering lips?
^
very powerful stanza, very well penned, and very very deep.

Perhaps he can,
so I'll dig in a little
deeper while thinking that
next time instead of
my nails,

I may even try to use
a real blade.

^
I completely understand the despair, the lostness, the pain, and the just..this fierce you wrote this poem with. It's incredible. Yhe emotions are moving, you cannot.no u cannot read this poem andjust move on..or leave few lines..

i can talk about this for days...hats off!

This piece gave me chills.... and seriously I got goosebumps... I could vision the uncomfortable feelings, biting of the lip, to hold back the powerful emotions that rush In.... and the ending just sank deep for me... powerful piece!!!!!

Liz,

I loved this poem so much. It was so emotional and easey to connect too.

What I love about your poetry is how you write in such a way that the reader gets lost in your words.

5/5