As I sit crying on the bathroom floor
Holding my precious blade to my skin
Seeing the ruby beads of blood
Never will I forget this night
So far in the past
And yet some days, this is all I long for
But I am too afraid that the dark cycle will begin again
That kind of torture, I cannot endure again
I content myself with scratching at wounds
Antagonizing my dog so he will bite
"Accidentally" getting papercuts at school
All those little things that no one notices
I turn all my energy into my true passion
Starving myself into a skinnier girl
Punishing when I go against my diet
And hiding it all from those that I love
Will my life never be normal?
Even with my acting career beginning,
I fear that my life will be an endless series of hospitals
Can I ever be normal? Or do I even want to be?
