Comments : Spirit Of Soul (Loop)

  • 12 years ago

    by Sylvia

    Nitin, so glad to see that you accepted the challenge and met it with flying colors. You gave the reader a tour through the spirit of a soul. Well done.

  • 12 years ago

    by TJ Arizona Eagle

    Wow
    Pride and greed are two of the most dangerous of things. Being humble and giving is indeed a better way.
    A perfect loop , with words full of wisdom. Great job my friend

  • 12 years ago

    by Karla

    Stellar piece my friend.Loved it.

  • 12 years ago

    by Meena Krish

    First off, let me say well done on this form poetry!!

    Surrounded by walls
    Walls full of pride
    Pride sometimes bleed
    Bleed deep inside

    ^There is satisfaction in this stanza and at the same time there is pain within the writer for this feeling. Its as if we work hard to achieve something and feel proud of it but somewhere along the line there is pain..perhaps a little bit of guilt for we have lost something along the way..so I feel. This opening stanza puts the reader with a deep thought.

    Spirit of soul died
    Died behind reality

    ^Reading this part I can imagine a free flying kite suddenly been pulled down to earth to be reminded what life is about! We tend to fly high and feel happy until reality brings us back with a jolt!

    Reality lives forever
    Forever breathe duality

    ^How true a statement my friend! Reality does live forever and that cannot be changed or moved.

    An interesting poem where many thoughts are put into the reader to think about..liked the read and once again excellent write!

  • 12 years ago

    by Ronel McCarthy

    Lovely loop .........shows how pride and greed etc of the physical world impacts on the spirit of the soul . X

  • 12 years ago

    by Lonely Rider

    I loved the theme of the poem, the way you have described them. Indeed pride and greed are the worst enemies a man can have. Beautifully penned.

  • 12 years ago

    by Hellon

    Nitin...why did I miss this? I generally only read poems when the member is signed in at the same time as me so....time differences perhaps?

    I know you were interested in this form so...kuddo's on you for trying it out and....your message was so strong here...especially in the second stanza.

    I think...in your first stanza it should be bleeds? but apart from that...it's very very good!

  • 12 years ago

    by Steven Beesley

    Nitin,

    So nicely done, I have always wanted to try the loop form but have never got around to actually writing a poem in this form.

    After reading yours which was excellent, I will now need to sit down and have a go at writing one myself.

    Great work my friend!

  • 12 years ago

    by Giegielove Goddess Poet

    Excellent!

  • 11 years ago

    by KELLiE SHEA

    That was really cool!! I am new to loop poetry. 5/5

  • 11 years ago

    by Giegielove Goddess Poet

    So a very touching poem...

    5/5 for you!

  • 9 years ago

    by gumshuda

    I love this poem...
    It's beautiful.