Comments : Distance

  • 12 years ago

    by silvershoes

    Short, simple, and sweet.

    I would suggest taking "so" out of "yet so full of light,"
    AND
    adding an additional blank line/space before the last line, to enhance the suspense of its delivery.

    Just suggestions. Lovely as is :)

  • 12 years ago

    by Chevalier des Fleurs

    Simple but to the point.
    Short and sweet and full of powerful emotions.
    I relate to this poem.
    I can see it in the Love Poem category as-well.
    Beautifully written.
    :)

  • 12 years ago

    by Rachit Bhanage

    Hmm...u seek here the simplicity,Guess its the outcome for feeling of something that can't be achieved,u relate it to stars...
    Ur poem does not diminish from the main concerned meaning and reveals your want towards at the ending.
    Really liked the phenomenons you sequenced and put through.
    Nicely accomplished !