Great work... i adore it

Curious yet oblique. I can see now the active metaphor being described here, although widely diverging ideas arose. It could have been a poisonous snake (cobra or asp), or possibly a spiritual force, or a bandit, or a genie. Knowing that the force is 'doubt' itself, I better understand that the impact of it's touch is both devastating to your former life and generative of a new way of being. The hidden message is how an unbreachable yet conquering force both wrecks your life and deepens your future. The cliche would be 'better to have lived,' etc. Your portrayal of dubiousness as a lurking beast is powerful. However, your use of 'maturate' takes away from the clean sense of the poem. The issue as to age seems not to have connection with any other part of the poem, as though you were forcing a rhyme. Your use of 'every' as having 3 beats in line two conflicts with using it (as part of 'everything') as having 2 beats in line 4; the final word ought to be <'do> indicating a contraction of <ado>. The sonnet structure of three quatrains followed by a couplet is an acceptable variant, although it makes the dual nature of your message harder to discern: your first two quatrains describe the sudden destructive force, while the third quatrain and ending couplet portray the long term impact. Excellent sonnet!

Seriously Meme!

I really hate you -_-.
not really, but I wish i could write like you :)!

you write freaking amazing!
Everytime I read something of yours, i can see it exactly how it would be in real life.

i can feel the anger in it and how everything follows it,

great job :)
5/5

Wow! I'm speechless! This is one of the best sonnets I've ever read... it flowed so well, and it didn't seem like a formed poem AT ALL! It was so nicely written... and such a unique topic..

I love the first line "born in the desert just like a sandstorm" .. it just really intrigued me.

The ending was lovely as well!

Amazing sonnet !!! =D

I found it! Here it is sweets :-)

This poem is a deep and thought provoking piece. Really enjoyed the message, however for me, the flow seemed a bit choppy in places... I will explain:
"you easily pause life for those you face."
"conquers any heart without further do. "
^^^ these two lines are beautiful... however, when you're restricted in a formed piece you really have to be careful with your word selection... to me, when I read sonnets I want them to flow... and both of these lines stumbled a bit while I read the poem...
In my opinion, Sonnets are difficult to write...very challenging and I think you did an overall great job... ~

new comment from me: To explain choppy and flow: that's what I meant in our talk about Iambic Pentameter.. the rhythm of the piece... I was just having this discussion with Lucero in my newest Sonnet. Iambic Pentameter's are technically not a must in sonnets, but most sonnets have it.. I opted to leave it out in the new one I wrote.. but that's what I meant in our discussion... hugs you!

Yay! I think you done a great job trying - you are uch braver than me as I have yet to try and understand this poem form haha.

The creativeness was great and in my opinion the poem was good, though like I say I don't understand the poem so can't fault it for anything lol.

P.s.. very eye catching title xx