Identity

by Judy kumar   Mar 13, 2012


My body is lifeless
Only because life seems lifeless right now
The ruins of this room are trapped
In the beginning of this sentence
Because you can't escape the starting line
You can only advance away from it

During last year's beginning
The faces that travel
Through the walls of this room
Disappeared
Yes they are gone now
Or maybe there are so many
That it is hard to differ

The walls are dried out and cracked
They leak from many sides
I put my face up against it
It does nothing
But it keeps me still
My body stays lifeless
Because life seems lifeless right now

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Latest Comments

  • 9 years ago

    by HumanInATree

    Awesome 5/5 hands down the feeling you invoked was true as hells

  • 12 years ago

    by Faithless Watermelon

    If I had any advice it would be to try and work on word choice. I feel like a stronger word here and there would do this poem wonders.

    Don't get me wrong, though. I was pretty stunned by this piece. I don't normally bother to read poetry on this site from a lot of the younger girls (or guys, whatever) because from what I have read, it's very bland and the voice is dull. I can go through a hundred young person's poems, written by a hundred different young people, and feel like I've just read one poem a hundred times. The point of me saying this is that you are different. You have a clear voice, and I can tell you're very passionate about not only the subject that you write about, but you're passionate about writing as well. I respect and admire that.

    You aren't perfect. You aren't the best, you aren't Shakespeare. Yet. But you might be, and I hope you keep writing and keep practicing because I think you have talent and a lot of potential.

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