Inside Of Me

You look at me and what you see
Is not what is inside of me.
The outside may be tattered and spent
From God my imnternal beauty was sent.

All my life, I've felt misfit,
Unable in a crowd to sit.
And feel that somewhere I belong,
No courage to sing my beautiful song.

Searching for a lesser crowd,
So I feel better and can stand proud.
Looking for who I might be,
Lost in that crowd looking for me.

Altering my mind with my rug,
My problems swept under the rug.
Decieved I feel that I fit in,
For reality is where my hell has been.

Nowhere on earth am I content,
A thousand places I have went.
So many people meeting there,
Yet not one for me would care.

Giving til I'm left without,
When it's all gone, at me you shout.
Sometimes all alone I cry,
Why is it that your love I have to buy?

Knowing deep inside my heart,
That over again I'll have to start.
All I've worked for, I gave away,
Hopeing when it's all gone, you'll stay...

Once again I'm all alone,
Not one of you that I have known,
Ever took the time to see,
The beauty that shines inside of me...

(Written by my sister)