Dead or Alive

Am I dead?
Am I alive?
Either on feels right
It feels the same at times

The bounding of my heart
Are they starting to stop
Or am I falling apart
It's too high to the top

Is this depression
Or just darkness
A blackout's condensation
Lonely soul's emptiness

I feel a lostness
Failing transgression
Haunted silentness
Devil's transmission

Traveling through a black hole
Not as dark as the hole in my heart
His thoughts full of coal
Gloomy shadows pulling me apart

She moved away
My best friend
My love didn't stay
Our relationship came to thy end

I'm in a place of torments
The doors locked to get out
Does happy times carry limits
What's one's soul about

And I wish I had footage
To never forget my advantages
To remember every page
Life has many passages

But when you fall down so hard on the ground
What do you do
When what you love the most doesn't come back around
What can you do

Leave me here dying
Losing the will to see
Watch the knifes killing
Always stabbing through me

Overcome with what's gone
Always told to move on
But why should I leave behind
The unforgetfulness of hope

You opened a door
Now I'm on the floor
But still I want more
So I can stop feeling sore

Am I dead
Am I alive
I wonder sometimes
I'm decaying in the dark