Possessed

"Possessed"

Great title. Really pulled me to read this piece. I was expecting a sort of 'spiritual possession' and this did not fail to deliver.

"It shadows becomes more solid"
it---its
becomes should be singular because the subject (shadows) is plural.

"A angry face begins to appear"
a---an

"No-one notices the transition
They believe that it is me
They do not know I am trapped
Screaming to be set free"
This part stands out for me. Shows struggle..

"I can see them losing patients"
patients--patience

"If only they knew the truth about
The force that lives deep inside
Controlling my thoughts and actions
That has my mind tied"
I feel this way a lot of times.. If only they 'understand'

"If only they knew that I was possessed
That my mind is not its own
Maybe they would actually help me
Instead of leaving to battle this force alone"
Great ending. But sometimes, there are battles we need to face alone, in order to win, so stand tall and fight :)

Great piece 5/5 Keep writing :)

-X

This was a fantastic dark poem. . . . its black aura reallly shows in the mysteriousness in this and I like it.

but everyone should know they are neber alone :)

Jen,

I love what you do with your writes. They are always filled with emotions I can relate to and you always manage to pull me in somehow with your poetry. This poem is completely sad but I feel a darkness as well especially with the images of being possessed. The idea that our thoughts and feelings are not our own. I adored the rhyming in this poem, the flow was awesome and I was hooked until the very end. Awesome write hun

x

You opened the door to the depth of sadness and allowed the reader to get the full emotional value..Excellent

Wow, that's all I can say 5/5