she said "we can no longer be,"
my body felt like it fell off a tree,
burnt to the fourth degree,
i hope that what she say she do not mean
^
It hurts when the one you love says that we can no longer be it hurts inside. You've done well expressing yourself in this stanza.
She tells me that i need to "go and move on,"
she said she "has" which i know is lies,
as i stop to bend and pick up a three leaf clover,
i repeat to myself that it is not over .
^
I also loved this stanza!
The one you love tells you she needs to move on.
she said she "has" which i know is lies
I would suggest you change it to
"She said " she needs to move on" but I know inside it's all just lies"
In my opinion it flows better(:
But overall I love this poem giving that message how broken you are when someone you love tells you I no longer can stay..