Lost love

Well guess Xanthe got all the important points
but still the idea in the poem is good so as the word choice
but i think other than the Grammar errors its still need to be rearranged
Still good one keep on =)

This piece needs a lot of work for its grammatical errors. However, the passion and dedication you've put here made it work. I'll try to correct the errors without changing the idea--
"Our Relations now got a pause,"
---Perhaps what your saying here is that your relationship had a temporary barrier, or you needed a 'break' to 'cool off'. "Our relationship have paused"
"Still your
thoughts in heart so close"
---What I understand here is that you can't keep her off your mind. "Still, thoughts of you linger close to my heart"
"But I was abandon for knocking your heart"
---Change 'abandon' to abandoned. It's different that you chose 'knocking', usually it would be 'breaking', but this is your poem and 'knocking' left your signature all over the piece. My only suggeation here is add 'down' between 'knocking' and 'your'
"as guest I regret for not being understood
though It's my test,"
--- Again, this is different. Perhaps your style, which is unique.
"I raise hands to dedicate you my prays, Still
you keep your heart away"
---I quite like this. You've added your religious aspect here. That you are devoted to God and to your belief.
"My soul got jam in clock turns,
Life phase is like shut down,"
---change 'jam' to jammed. The second line, in my interpretation is that life has a phase, in which a person 'shuts down'. My suggestion in the last line there: "Life has a phase where we shut down"
"Your immorality brought me down
It forced me to reverse my philosophy,"
---this is a stand out in the whole piece. Really shows your love for her and how she changed you. Nice.
"It led to compose a different policy,
Brought me in situation where no
anticipation
It soaked my paled face and no expectation"
---I quite like the ending. Showed that you did everything for this girl. But add 'me' between 'led' and 'to'. Add 'a' between 'in' and 'situation'. Remove 'it' in the last line and change paled to pale, change 'and' in the last line to 'with'
That's all I can do, but still really nice, Deepak. Keep writing :)
-X