Hmm tho i didnt like the repeated lines
but i think it was for a purpose and it gave it
nice,short and simple poem
5/5 keep writing =)

The repetition wasant to bad, I still liked it, and you did well with the other lines and putting it together, its quite interesting :)

I would suggest you remove the capitalizations after the comma so that it flows better.

Uhmm... That type of repetition is uhmm to some extend tiring. I would love to see this piece in another way so that you could still use some repetition but less than what you just used.