You Don't Know What Happened

That day you told me that you had proposed.
My life then started a 2nd beginning.
I felt ashamed w/uncontrollable crying.
Bc for someone else, your heart is winning.
Believe in me when I say i want you to be happy.

The keyboard on my cell then starts to becoome wet.
Suffering in the memories, I have always kept.

You've started a new life.
That will become offical.
A 2nd life for you, a 2nd life for me.
It's been hard to move on & now you've only made it harder on me.
When months ago, I was the girl you'd meet and marry.

You say you've missed me.
Well I've missed you too.
I'm such a hurt fool.
Cannot get over you.
Then you texted me, I thought you had came back.

Because even though you said bye to me for my lie & the intro of someone else.
I had this strong feeling, that I'd be dreaming of of you again.

When I looked out my bedroom window at night.
My terrible lie sat up there on the moon.
Unsure, I tell mysef this present will pass us soon.

I try to go to sleep but I cannot stop dreaming of you.
Wondering what would of happened if I told the truth too soon.

In school, my friends ask me whats wrong.
It sits there right in my f..king head.
Bang'n my brain w/the memories I now dread.

Sad little face.
What's wrong.
Are you letting the pain get too strong?

The distance erupting in your mind.
At night, you nd me sit up there in space.
Our love was felt yet blind.

So hard to forget you.
So hard for you to remember.
You think you know everything.
But guy, you'll never know.

I didn't text you yesterday because honestly it is hard.
I wondered, if you noticed this morning or if you know that probbly my feelings will never go.

I'm so surrounded, yet so alone.
I remember how we relied on a phone.
I would like to hear your voice again, but I know that will never happen.
I think about it sometimes.
& how I told you when we first met, that you sounded so young.

You've missed me so.
You tell me you still care..I know.
But didn't you think it'd be best to leave me alone.
Maybe if you had thought it out.
And I'm sure you have.

You asked me hows my love life.
I told you he truth.
I asked the same.
After 2nd txt, I noticed you hadn't answered the q.

It hit me, like mom's belt.
That you might be getting married too soon.
Before my finalized apology to you.
I didn't want to ask because I knew it had to be true.
But I asked to see if I'd have a 2nd chance w. you.

You told me you had proposed to a girl in Cancun on your b-day.
Told me, you've never been happier & that it was perfect.
My room started to spin.
On my bed..sitting at the end.
The end of life.
Disgustingly crying hard with face buried in soakened palms.

Maybe I should get a dog..

I understand everything.
Does not mean I have no pain from you.
I then texted you I don't think we should text anymore.
You freaked.
Are you trying deperately hard to make me weak and weep.

We.Will.NeVER.Be

I don't want to know her name.
It'll haunt me for awhile, for life.

I don't want to know when you guys are getting married.
It'll haunt me for awhile, for life.

If I was to ever hear it or see it.
I'd grow into a corpse, this time.

Who needed anything when you meant everything.

One day I stopped texting him, haven't heard from him since.
I know he'll always care about me.

You don't know everything that happened to me.

Dedicated: To The Guy Who Once Made Me Happy
Trey L.

Written: 3.20.12
(Bored in History)