Never Ending Battle .

I've been stuck in this rut for months now,
I can't decide whether to keep going or end this pain forever.

My anger and depression has gotten a hold of me,
and just wont let go.

I'm in this never ending battle with myself,
and I want this to end.

I can't make any choices,
My mind is in a fog,
And I can't see up ahead of me.

I'm sick of being unhappy wherever i go,
And whoever says happiness is a choice,
You're all stupid.

Happiness is an emotion.
Nothing required for life,
But would really be needed to make life good.

I'm in a never ending bad luck spell,
Has God done this to me?
What's he trying to prove?
Is he trying to tell me I shouldn't belong here?

I'm trying to find where I belong,
I feel like nothing really matters anymore.
And I want at least something to matter...
Anything....

Wherever I go,
Whatever I do to try,
I'm never happy.
I'm seeking this so called "happiness"
And it's not showing itself.

All I'm asking for is a little luck and some happiness.

Is that too much to ask?