Murder (Triquint).

by Steven Beesley   Jun 8, 2012


My heart, on a platter before you
Pain I have, I wish you knew
Sharp knife you ran through
Blood you drew
Cry

My blood running cold and turning blue
pain abates as hatred grew
Sharp knife you ran through
Blood you drew
Die

My sight grows dim and goes out of view
Soon I will bid you adieu
Sharp knife you ran through
Blood you drew
Bye

Triquint:

Triquint, a poem for created by Sylvia A. Feeley, which consists of 3 verses, 5 lines each. Lines 3
and 4 of verse 1 (Refrain) repeat in verses 2 and 3. The syllable count for each stanza is 9, 7, 5, 3, 1
and has an aaAAb rhyme scheme.

8th June, 2012

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Latest Comments

  • 12 years ago

    by Meena Krish

    You know this could also be taken in another way as murder of trust and everything along with it dies as well..at least that is how I see it too..maybe I am wrong. Nonetheless you have done well with this form and brought out your message clear...excellent!

  • 12 years ago

    by Meme

    Ohhhhh I love this form, its new to me. You did it justice with this dark emotional piece. I specially liked the progression of it, from crying to dieing and eventually a goodbye. Flowed so perfectly ..

    I will give this form a try I guess :P

  • 12 years ago

    by Purple Rose

    I agree, this is an excellent piece. I can see the darkness and the pain coming out of it. From what I understand, it seems that someone ripped your heart out and then destroyed it.

    Excellent
    5/5

  • 12 years ago

    by Dagmar Wilson

    Wow, Stephen, you did it
    I love the format, I can see the dark coming out
    excellent

  • 12 years ago

    by Ingrid

    This is a tought format, Steven, but you nailed it.

    It read like a short story of a man who had had enough, it gave me goose bumps.

    Well thought out, good job:)

    5/5 Ingrid

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