Good effort,
Nothing wrong with a few cheesy rhymes!!
My poetry is full of it.
Every one of mine on here was written the pen and paper way. (which works if unlike me you have neat handwriting, otherwise trying to decipher what you have written a few days later is a right pain.)

onto your poem sorry....

if only I could back to that,
that time when I just did what I did
without being beaten
and bullied by second thoughts,
nor regrets.. without aching
somewhere

I like the emotion in this stanza the best, Bullied by seconds thoughts is a great term.

I have just read it again... I like how the mood darkens as you read it. Starts off quite sure of themselves then seems to dwell at the end.

Thanks for the read.

Darren

Niccely written. There is nothing wrong with writing with pen and paper, I am of the old school and I love to compose my poems with pen and ink. I don't mean ball point pens either, I am very old school and love to write with fountain pens.

This piece brings a bit of nostalgia back for me when reading it and it does set the atmosphere for the whole write which is great. I don't know why but images of Hemingway sprang into my mind when I was reading your write.

Thanks for the entertaining read.

When I write, I enter dream world... and now I dont want to leave from all the visions Ive created in my head while reading this piece... this is beautiful in so many ways...