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by L
Hehe, sorry. Okay, So this line has 6 syllables and it should have 5...Please help me get better. So my suggestion is to change "better" to "well" then it will have 5 syllables.
by Steven Beesley
Thanks, I missed that. Today is not my day for writing. I completely rewrote the (Lai) poem as I forgot about the rhyme requirement (idiot that I am), hehehe =)