Half-past One

Oh, Meme...this is beautiful. I absolutely fell in love with this piece. Now before I begin, I would like to say the message that I found here...I found you missing someone, but why is this in the dark section? I don't find it absolutely dark at all...I find it quite sad actually. If any of the sections, I thought it would go into the grieving, loss of the sad & depression section. However, that is just me (sorry, I have a tendency to ramble to myself ): )

"I thought your picture was burnt
in my eyes but I was wrong. Never
have I struggled to remember your
face, simply because you always
timed the moments our eyes met."

^ Beautiful beginning. It tells the reader how much this person ment to the narrator in the poem - "I thought your picture was burnt in my eyes..." < That line right here is such an expressive line to me, because the only reason that one would remember a picture like that was if one stared so hard at it, but the person the poem didn't need that picture did they? The person only needed to look into their eyes (of the apparent dead person) and they would remember everything :]

"You blindfolded me with those
images of what life will be like.
so I built faith around you; and
in us .."

^ This section is also a beautiful section, but I have one teeny, tiny request: second like 'will' should be 'would' because you are talking in the past tense. Other than that, this shows me that the two people in the poem had a really close relationship and then in the next part it tells me that something happened :( because the 'us' was no longer. It was only 'one.'

"You painted the hallways with your
laughter, now I seek a reason to
smile. And you planted a garden of
kisses upon those moments, now
there is no reason to keep them alive."

^ In this stanza, and the one after, I can feel your pain and how you miss the person. It actually made me tear up inside because I can only imagine the feeling.

The ending (starting at the sixth stanza) is probably my favorite part. It made me feel like the person in the poem missed the certain person so much that they are willing to die to be with them, but the ghost of the apparent dead person made them stay (hopefully you can make sense of that sentence :]) There is just so much emotion in here that I cannot believe it. If this is not true, then I must say that you are verrrrry good at expressing emotions here. Beautiful. Absolutely beautiful.

Note that this is what I thought of it...I hope I was somewhere near the truth of what you were trying to portray in this poem...or else I might have been completely bonkers, but who knows?

Excellent/beautiful/heartbreaking
5/5

I hate reading a poem that just blows me away...and this one did just that...
and the reason is because I get so speechless and emotional I have nothing to say...

I want to leave a comment that speaks of the words and explains how I feel about it but I can't, I actually have nothing to say that would do this piece justice.

I loved the title, it seemed cliche in this day and age but actually wasn't...The flow was awesome (though you know this) and I couldn't ask you to change anything.

:)
Great work

Hey, i love this poem..."Naughtymouse" is correct, don't change anything because its beautiful..i felt thee same way not too long ago and that feeling really just sucks... </3

Oh, damn you. You suck.

If you change anything in this poem, I'll go to wherever you live and suffocate you with my bare hands, okay? Because this is your best piece ever. One that isn't really dark (for me) but such sad, sad images it does have. I love so many stuff, I don't know why your poetry became something haunting me, haha, I always like to get back and read them.

The title made me feel that this is going to be cliche, honestly, although it is kinda original. Still, I wasn't let down when I started reading, don't worry, I never am with your words. ;)

'simply because you always
timed the moments our eyes met.'

If only plagiarism isn't a crime, teehee. What a 'queer' image, sorry for my weird wording, haha. The way you said that you never really tried to squeeze your memory and remember him made me realize that you are not strong but he is omnipresent in your mind. That is such a sad thing. I always am reminded of people who rarely, or never, care about me. I relate. I feel. I love.

I already tried to nominate this but it said that I have voted three times this week. I don't know why I can't remember that I had, lol. I will nominate this next week if nobody nominates it this week. I want to see something sad and simple on the front page!

Really well-done.

Meme i have to agree with lioness compleatly, so in awe of you right this write is so damn powerful and hearfelt, it just oozes emotions like you wouldnt believe.....just epic truely epic and sooooo nominated