Crying,
it's almost midnight,
not knowing what to do,
randomly wandering in my house,
while everyone is asleep,
silently crying and walking in circles.
what happenned to me,
in five days i turned myself into this,
a happy mess we could say.
being myself for five days,
is killing me from the inside,
as he said to me one day,
with happiness comes despair.
I don't know what's hurting me,
it's ten thousand different things,
my mind exploding,
with each of my everyday breakdown.
maybe it's the fact,
no one supports me,
that i support everyone,
but no one does it back.
maybe it's the fact,
that now I know what a sick person I am,
that I am such a mean and evil person,
that people couldn't stand it if I showed it.
maybe it's the fact,
that no one accepts me,
the real me,
everybody hates that girl.
it hurts knowing,
i will have to play a character all my life,
that no one will ever like me,
and that I'm alone in this world.
what else hurts is watching everybody grow,
everybody change greatly,
and in such a good way,
and hating you you've become,
hating yourself.
