You win...[Number 2]

Don't go into the light.
Stay here where it's safe.
But what's so bad about the light?
I wanna go into it.

Should I have a reason to stay?
Mr. Fluff? My dad?
Two reasons.
Not enough.

Why wake up in that hospital bed
fulls of scars and memories.
Nightmares that will haunt you.
Your image will never fade.

The light was blinding.
Stupid hospital lights.
I groaned at them.
My legs felt like mush.

All over I ached.
My head pounded.
Chest constricted from air.
It was like I was beaten with a train.

"Sarah?" My dad croaked.
I looked over at him.

His face was red.
Not with angry.
Tears still hung on his eyes.
He rushed to my side.

"I'm so sorry.
I told Kelly to leave.
She wasn't right. Your nothing like
your mother."

I didn't know what to say.
Well, I couldn't say much.
My throat was dry and tongue useless.
So, I did what they do in the movies.

Resting my weak hand on my dad's rough one.
He held it tight.
"I'm so sorry."
Dad whispered again.

Again, what can I do?
I just woke up and he wants me to talk?
Slightly tilting my head in a nod.
"I-i k-now-w" the words felt like gravel.

But still. This didn't make it right.
One crash and he's sorry?
I bet once I'm well.
He'll start drinking again.

No, it ends now.
I push myself to a stand.
Against my screaming body.
"Sarah? What are you doing?"

I could see it close.
My reflection was twisted.
But it was me.

My face... my beautiful face.
I grabbed the handle
holding it close.
"Put that down." Dad growled.

I looked at him.
Did he look in my room yet?
Sitting in my pillow?
Did he see that note I left?

So simple.
So smooth.
Just a slice.
Across my neck.

My dad
he didn't reach me in time.
Of course he didn't.
He wanted this.

I was once so high.
Now I'm lower than low.
Bleeding out on the floor.
Why should I get back up?

They'll just kick me back down.
I give up.
I give in.
You win.