Beginnings

Hi!!! I thought that I would take a look at your poems...I noticed that you were in the request to read/comment on your poems, so I thought why not? You probably did not want me to share that with you, but I just thought that I would :]

I thought that this was an interesting poem.

'Feel the age upon my face
your grace, it pulls me through
a whirlwind path into your heart
a world not quite your own'

^ I was a little confused by the first line of this stanza...I don't know what you are trying to say here. The only thing that comes to my mind is wrinkles, and old age. I believe that this is a metaphor, correct? So, are you trying to say that even though you are aging, her love still makes you feel...special? Feel loved? That makes sense...I'm sorry, but I am deciphering this as I read it.

'it's a danger, fear
a risk that we must take
this stranger, dear
now yours, to love or to break'

^ I get this one! I think. Love is always a risk, because you never know when your heart will get broken. Also, when there are certain factors involved, it makes it even worse...it suck sometimes, but in the end, if everything works out, it is always worth it.

'feel that etch upon your soul
your touch, it pulled me through
a foolish kiss on wanting lips
our world we breathe, together
alone'

^ This is probably my favorite stanza, because it brings it all to a close. Like the big finale, if you understand. I loved this :]

Overall, this has beautiful imagery. I find nothing wrong with it, so I can just praise it right now. I might have totally butchered it though, but I did give my interpretation of it. It seems like you were afraid of the age difference or something, but then the person pulled you through which made you realize that love can cure everything or something. Like I said, I am probably butchering it, but that is my thoughts about it. To me, it is a very beautiful poem nonetheless.

Excellent
5/5