Comments : Childhood

  • 12 years ago

    by Yakari Gabriel

    I am such a huge fan of yours.

  • 12 years ago

    by Alanis

    Defiantly a win!!!

  • 12 years ago

    by Dagmar Wilson

    Due for nomination
    I adore this write

  • 12 years ago

    by LittleMermaid

    Excellent!!

  • 12 years ago

    by Hellon

    Thist starts off extremely well there is no doubt about it and...an etheree isn't very easy to write I know. Just something for you to look a tperhaps and take on board when you write your next one..

    My
    lilies
    grow at the
    touch of your voice;
    with every promise
    breathed on the nape of my
    neck, a single petal turns

    ^^

    Can you see that you have dragged neck into the next line just so that the syllable count is right?

    white whilst thorns thrust deeper into
    my palm 'til the night finally fades
    ...I am left with a bouquet of my past

    It's just something to be aware of next time.

  • 12 years ago

    by Hannah Lizette

    Definitely nominated next week. :)

    Adding to my favorites so I can read every single day for the rest of my life, haha. I seriously love it that much.

    That last line <3

  • 12 years ago

    by Yrem Crish

    This poem is deserve to win...you write it like in a magic way...you're so brilliant, Xanthe. I always salute you for writing awesome poems and this one, is another excellent piece!

  • 12 years ago

    by Darren

    What a great poem, you have set the bar high with this one, the rest of your club will have to come up with something amazing to beat this.
    I love the whole atmosphere of this poem, i think the last line is great, 'bouquet of my past' it makes me think of all the things we regret and have bunched together as one big bad memory.

    Great write.

  • 12 years ago

    by Tara Kay

    I don't think I have read anything of yours before, or at least commented...

    I love the essence of an Etheree, short poems can hold so much emotion...if done correctly...and you certainly added heart to this piece...

    It is beautiful and sad at the same time...with some really great lines...

    I think this symbolises regret and a lost childhood, being forced to grow up too quickly and forgetting the need to play and be free.

    Really nice piece, Xanthe

    x

  • 12 years ago

    by Meme

    I can see a vivid picture of a blooming lily in my head, every new grown petal! So clear in my head..

    Its like this persons voice is watering you, its a one of a kind metaphor that I never came across before. I love it. And yes, I always love it when poets use whispered promises, it add something different than just saying simply promises. But then the picture take another turn when you mention the deeply thrusting thorns, eeeekkk that image was powerful to me!

    And you had one of the best endings I read in a while, I love the idea of being left with a bouquet of your past, cause I seem to be dragging my own pasts' bouquet!

    Nominated next week for sure :)

  • 12 years ago

    by Decayed

    That looks like a Cedar;

    another perfect piece by you.

    I have read it now more than 5 times.