Comments : A Club For Two

  • 12 years ago

    by Thomas

    Nice write Meme!

    I like the metaphor of a club symbolizing the unity between 2 people.
    But like a club you need to let other people in now and again to make a livable situation.
    Life can't be a symbiosis with 1 person.

  • 12 years ago

    by Darren

    Wow

    There is me divulging in my club of one. Then along comes this beast of a poem discussing a club of two.

    The rhyme scheme is awesome the poem is very tight with a beautiful flow.
    I hope your club of two works for you.

    Meanwhile back into hiding in my club of one.

    : - (

  • 12 years ago

    by BlueJay

    This is an amazing piece. Usually I am not a fan of the repetition, but here it was the icing on the cake. I love how your voice was so calm and sweet here, it was wonderful. The style was magnificent. The word choice was so simple but it didn't need to be elaborate for the point to come across. I like the idea of a club for two, though I think it would fit better as a love or friendship poem than it does life. (But that's just me) I really enjoyed the subtle rhymes, that was a nice touch.

    Excellent piece.

  • 12 years ago

    by Chelsey

    I know the feeling of wanting to be in a club of two whether it be a lover or friend.

    Very well described meme, I like the "let's do it, no questions asked" type of attitude. Sometimes you just got dive in and see where the wind blows you. :)

    I liked this! :)

  • 12 years ago

    by Boy

    A club for two,

    the title is what makes the reader its a love poem.

    its amazing how the idea comes in your mind its amazing.

    Just a club for two
    for us to get through
    Keep each others sane
    from what caused us pain

    first stanza starting is very flowing. i can see the rhyming aswell aabb on every stanza that makes me like the flowing river. its something when reader read this he/she automatically flow and enjoy the rest of poetry. its very cute love poem no doubt.

    Just a club for two
    Lets walk with no clues
    Nothing to comprehend
    And see where we end

    it makes me remember about the first love the line lets walk with no clues excellent.

    and now talk about it

    Just a club for two
    No standing in a queue
    For love to be found
    when we share a bound

    its the passion simply its the passion we dont want to wait and see anyone else when we love someone. there is no patience in this stanza becasue love does not demand for patience sometimes. in other words i will say it passion.

    and now this one

    Just a club for two
    I'll be pink and you a blue
    Paint a world of dreams
    and write reams and reams

    its simply the dreaming first inspiring love. dreams and reams ryhmed very well. two and blue not so well but they fit realy good .

    see this
    Just a club for two
    Even to me this is new
    But I surrender it all
    and for you I want to fall

    fall and fall and fall the last line of above stanza makes it perfect.

    the last stanza
    Just a club for two
    with only me and you
    I am ready to start
    so hand me your heart

    very romantic my favorite.
    specially when the writer say i am ready to start so hand me your heart. thats good.

    Well again the idea is so good that realy inspires those writer specially who could not write from ages. great work.. it deserves to be nomnated. a perfect win.

    • 12 years ago

      by Meme

      Thanks a lot for the comment :)