Comments : Get prepared (Tanka)

  • 12 years ago

    by Amreen

    A very true message.... I liked the form used to depict a message of life.. Tankas help to speak a message of wisdom which induces deep thinking by the reader and probably follow it... Tankas help in a way to beautify your message and make it a delight to read....Great attempt sir and thanks for the message...:)

    Always remember
    You were born only crying,
    while people laughing

    ^^
    The beginning is good and you have made a smart use of syllables here. I suggest you to put a full stop after laughing as it ends the starting part and is necessary.. I feel so as the other part is conveying a message.

    Work goodness to die laughing,
    while they're Crying and weeping

    ^^^
    A good end to a good start and a true message nicely conveyed through just few words...:)
    I would suggest the alphabet 'C' should be lower-case... I think it might be a typing mistake... but overall a 5/5 piece...
    Loved reading it:))