I love this poem do much!
I feel the same way about this site. When I joined I was planning to die buy because of it... I've met people that help me trough the hurt.
I'm here for you <3
Amazing 5:5

You have a really good poem here I feel. It's very honest and full of raw emotion. I think you could improve on it a whole lot more if you changed the layout to make the rhymes at the end of each line....I think it would flow so much better if you did.

If you need some help....just let me know.

I think it looks much better now...it's much easier on the eye of the reader. I'd just ask you to have a look at this stanza...

To break the chains of myself loathing
of secret fears and thoughts unspoken,
unto a world which I lament,
and regret taking every breath.
I keep on trying but get knocked down
that's not a smile I'm upside down.

you have used the word down twice....maybe try to substitute one of them.....frown rhymes haha!!!

I love this poem it's beautiful and i just love the concept
5/5 from me sweetie
Lady Ash