Unreachable

Holy crap. So much passion and sadness packed into a beautiful piece. You know that I know exactly the emotions in this. The last lines of the stanzas "Yes, I am envious." and "Yes, I am selfish." are exactly what people hold back from saying in those situations and you just smacked someone in the face with them.

The last line, however, is where this piece is knitted together. Two lines that tell a whole story.

I really enjoyed this.
-AJ

First, i love the title. And what i found inside itz excellent. The volcanic the lava. Makes your words very strong and powerful. Great personification. You are a gd poetess keep it up.

L felt the heat in your love

This poem is so breathtaking!! omg the emotions especially the use of the volcanic theme just makes it all full of feelings.. The final stanza alone is enough to show how much you desire him and want him while he is in the arms of another.. this piece made me cry! well done! 5/5

I am well aware you have been told this (or similar variations) already by several others, but it can't hurt to say it again:

This piece is amazing!

Seriously. Firstly, your word choice. Oh.My.God. These words are like, meant to be. I can't really explain it any other way. The right choice and flawlessly arranged at that. I particularly love the volcanic theme throughout - which brings to mind underlying emotions, but more on that shortly - by using such words as: 'lava' 'explosion' 'heat' 'scorched' ... Really like that added element. But what I also like about you using that theme is that you didn't dwell on it and also that halfway through you abandoned it as a sort of lonely, calm fell over the piece. Really incredible.

Pace and flow. The flow was faultless throughout the piece. Pace seemed to change throughout the piece, but this didn't put readers off (at least not me anyway). I think that instead of being confusing, it actually added to the overall emotion behind the piece, and the changing pace rates seemed to come across as your change in emotions or the degree to which you were feeling. Hence, the pace was actually incredibly fitting for the piece, whether it was intentional or natural, I don't know, but I like it either way. (:

Emotion. As I said above, the volcanic theme seemed to play to your emotions beautifully. In the beginning it seemed like you were having a civil war within yourself: anger vs. sadness. Yes, you were crying, but were those tears of sadness or anger? That's the impression I got. But not only that, I also got the impression that the volcanic theme was somewhat representational of the depth of emotional, how strongly you were feeling it and therefore how much impact each tear (for instance) had upon you. But as I said above, this volcanic theme sort of evaporates to a calm - yet it seems to bring forth even deeper emotion. To me it seems like you have finally lost all hope, that you have cried all your tears and now you're feeling especially empty - perhaps because those tears were the last thing that felt real or alive even. It seems to me like you've gone into a somewhat depressive state, perhaps amplified by the fact that the fireworks of the volcanic theme have been abandoned. Ah, another emotion I can sense within your words.

I will also note, that I really love how you somewhat berate yourself in the poem. With the 'Yes, I am selfish' statement. Perhaps berate is the wrong word, but I'm running a mind blank here for a better one, lol. Anyway, I really like how you take just a second to state this about yourself, to notice your flaws. To me it also shows your anger a little bit - and perhaps not completely at this other person.

Imagery. Well, not only within the volcanic theme, but also other segments, the imagery really was vivid. The part with the moon is a large standout. But overall, that opening stanza really cannot be beat when it comes to imagery. WOW!

The ending. Yes, everyone has already beat me in saying this. But that ending was incredible. Enough said really.

The title. I really like this. It's simple, to the point and yet still speaks volumes and still draws in a crowd. Yep, it's perfect.

Overall,
I really just love this piece. No flashy words, just simply love it. For starters, it drew me in, hook-line-and-sinker, and anchored me to the piece, right until the end. << Gosh, I'm in a strange mood if I'm using boating terms, but anyway, I shall continue >> And you maintained power and emotion behind every word for the entire piece. And the fact that you had mini themes throughou the piece which still kept with the overall storyline and emotion - now that is brilliant. I love it << Have I said that yet. Because I do. It's true. It's being added to my favourites, like RIGHT NOW!

So, and I think you already realise what I will rate this, but this undeniably deserves a 5/5 -- more in fact if it were able to given, but it's sadly not possible, so five/five. (: