Comments : A Musing

  • 12 years ago

    by L

    "A girl with a glee and yondering of a smile"

    ^^ The word yondering.. I think it should be yonder because yonder is not a verb.. rather an adverb and adjective...

    A girl with a glee and a yonder of a smile.
    I like the word yonder, first time I see it in a poem.

    "A season for the bringing in of a days work,"

    ^^ This one sounds a tad strange. . .

    A season for bringing in a days work.

    Also the ending, I think it would sound better like

    "But it's not so" instead of "but is not so."

    Content: I might have misunderstood it, but here goes what I understood.

    It seems that depression of a girl might be "a musing" for true love along with beer and being in a drunk state. When someone is sad and with some beers down the throat plus a hug.. kiss.. they might just go with the feeling of not feeling lonely..

    But towards the end, it says but it is not so. Even if during that moment they think that it might be, it is not so.. it probably is the drunken state.

    Sorry if I misunderstood.

    • 12 years ago

      by Blood of a Lion

      Actually its funny I do all of my poems via a phone typing them out in text and sometimes they come out great other times not so much. Thank you for soul. It was delicious.