Requiem for a Memory

I woke in my bunk to the quiet rustling of the other soldiers making ready. We've been stationed in this valley 713 days today, 682 days since last contact. Almost two years spent sitting, waiting. Sitting and waiting for the death knell of the sirens to sound. An information of inexorable demise. Duty, they called it.
I rolled over and winced as my canteen met my spine. I arched, reached, and retrieved it. Propping myself up on my elbow, I unscrewed the cap but, without taking a drink, screwed the cap tight a moment later.
Falling back into my pillow, my eyes drifted to the cracks in the ceiling and I found myself wishing an escape. To slip between those fractures into nothingness. Soon gone, soon forgot. I indulged in the fantasy of reprieve: rest my head, embrace the void, and glimpse the construct of my oblivion. Numb.
"You. Get up." Another soldier ruptured my illusion. "Commander's gonna talk."
"Somebody piss in his soup again?" I offered halfheartedly.
He looked at me. "Could be. Field in twenty." Expressionless, he left quicker than he'd come.
Less than fifteen minutes later I was standing at ease with the other soldiers. The Commander cleared his throat and began to speak, "I'm here to address the complaints regarding..."
I tuned out, too tired to listen to another morale boost. My thoughts drifted.
Flashes.
Long brown hair, beautiful smile, intelligent eyes.
But I was losing her. She was an old photograph in my mind, creased and yellowing, slowly fading to join those forgotten.
"... duty to defend our homes..."
I have no home I thought bitterly. Not anymore.
"...standing in defense of those who depend on us."
Thousands of images seared through my mind at this.
Flashes.
Slam the brake, screeching tires, shattered glass, bloody brown hair, broken smile, empty eyes.
I have nobody left who depends on me I thought, no longer bitter.
"Dismis-"
The Commander evanesced in a cocoon of flame and debris before he could finish. Sirens. The field around me exploded in motion but I had yet to break parade rest. Ashen clouds bear witness to chaos. Other soldiers yelled orders but I couldn't hear them. My chest felt warm. The pumping in my ears drowned everything out. People ran in slow motion. Already there were bodies everywhere. Suddenly exhausted, I lowered myself to the ground using an abandoned sack to rest my head. As battle raged my eyes closed heavy, hailing my lonely curtain call. Extrication at long last by the ward of her memory absolved. Not long for this world, be this breath finality. I relinquished existence thinking of what Sarah said:

"Now who's gonna watch you die?"

Put my memory to rest.