Comments : Blades

  • 12 years ago

    by Yakari Gabriel

    I hope this is fiction or you are in trouble with me , miss palm.

  • 12 years ago

    by Wild flower

    Let pain heal my pain thats what you thought in the beginning, but after the physical pain, you realized that you'll not forget that person.

    The ending is soooooo touching, the use of fall, and the cold weather ended it perfectly..

    Great job:)
    Hope all is good

  • 12 years ago

    by Baby Rainbow

    I split my wrist in half today, and as I watched
    the blood transcend down my forearm, I was
    intrigued. The stinging, the pulsating, the throbbing,
    it was meant to enjoy...that's what I've always heard.

    - complex situation with so many different opinions and views on it. This was a good opening because straight away we can feel out own thoughts about it coming up, and mine is that I could relate to all of your words and it shows exactly how deep the emotions were that this was done to help ease it.

    Blonde hair, green eyes fooled you didn't it?
    You probably thought I would never stoop this low,
    but you pushed me to breaking and I needed
    something other than poetry to release you from
    the core of my being.

    - This stanza slightly is more worrying because it sounds very very much like you and so I begin to wonder if this poem is true, which would just be even more sad if it was. But again you show that the pain was so much you felt you had no choice but to make it go away, by whatever means.

    You left me with nothing.
    So I branded myself with something.
    Scars.

    - I love this line, for a self harmer these scars are very meaningful for them because they represent something, wheteher it is a loss of a person, the pain, the memories, the control. so many different things but each scar represents something to them.

    Voices reassured me that the pain
    will distract my thoughts from you.
    They were right except,
    I carved your name
    on the other arm.

    - good mention of the voices as this could be both real voices you have heard in life and how they say it has helped them feel better, or it could be ( which I assume it is ) the voices in your head who whisper to yout hat if you do it it will make the pain stop.
    - as for the name being carved on the other arm, this is powerful because it shows that no matter how much pain you cause yourself or your body, nothing will get rid of this pain that you no longer have this person with you.

    I'm just glad its fall because
    it's my excuse to acting gloomy.
    I'm just relieved that its cold
    because these long sleeves
    need to cover my shrine to you.

    - It's good you brought the season into this, fall is such a mixed emotion season, it is cold and dark and gloomy and although a lot of people love this, it relates to depression and loneliness so much. I think a lot of people get dragged down by the gloom of the fall.
    - The coldness for the sleeves is typical of this act because we feel so shamed by what we have done it is like our secret way of coping which we must hide and cover up fro the rest of the world because we dont think they would ever understand.

    Chels, this poem really touched me in a lot of ways and I just want to leave you with some hugs if this is what you are going through.

    xx