Comments : Your effect (Chained haiku)

  • 12 years ago

    by PinkyPrincess

    Wow.. this was a really interesting chained haiku! I should try this sometime :)

    I like how you describe this person... it seems like it could be a woman or a man, I kind of like the mystery of not knowing who it is, and this person seems intimidating, and powerful. Someone you may fear...

    I think it's well-written and a mysterious poem! My only concern is with this part:

    "You seem not seeing"

    ^^ I just feel like it doesn't make much sense, but I think I do get what you mean. Maybe you could rephrase this part to make it clearer to the reader?

    Just a suggestion.

    Great job Khalid!