Some days seem to be simpler than others
Some are shorter and darker,
The days come when the shadows come
Sneaking up to my thoughts, my inter psyche
Then I feel nothing, except for:
Hate, Numbness, Confusion, and Insignificance
Why? Why do my thoughts turn on me?
I can't figure it out
I work so hard to be happy and "stable"
It is not as easy as it looks
I try, put on my painted happy face, beautiful smile
In the true depths of my thoughts,
I am crying and screaming on the inside
My eyes fill up with salty tears
More times than I could ever count
I will not let them fall; I will not be a victim of my emotions
Always holding my breath, trying to hold them in
Hiding my emotions, they seem to get me nowhere
Only deeper into my despair and self loathing
When am I going to be better?
Maybe Never....
I'm just wanting to hide from myself.
