Comments : Words on the tongue of a handicap

  • 12 years ago

    by Amreen

    Beautiful... This piece speaks volumes.... :)

  • 12 years ago

    by Mohan

    Great khalid

  • I LOVE THIS PIECE. I love the blunt truth you have represented, and I applaud you for saying it.

    Just one thing:

    'hand' (1st line) should be 'hands' I believe

    I must say, I like your rule-breaking in terms of punctuation. It is clear where the line breaks are but the punctuation is unnecessary. Perhaps add one fullstop at the very end as a definitive statement? Other than that though, really wise choice as it shows your talented use of literature and your design ability when writing.

    The flow and tone of this piece were perfect.
    The word choice and arrangement was perfect.
    There is absolutely nothing I don't like about this piece -> adding to my favourites!

    Overall, I like the blunt reality you present here and the message you have conveyed. I also think perhaps you have constructed a shape poem here... not definite, but I can see several simple shapes with this piece including, an hourglass, a tongue and a wine glass:

    Hourglass: time; only time will uncover this truth to people.
    Tongue: it's apart of your title so it holds significance.
    Wine glass: celebration at embracing this reality.

    I genuinely love this piece, Khalid. Well done.

    Five/Five

    • 12 years ago

      by Khalid M Darwish

      Thank you Alisha for your comment, the most valuable.

  • 12 years ago

    by L

    All of us are disable no doubt... our feelings, heartbreak, depression, fear, insecurities... etc.
    injure us to the point of not knowing what to do and to the point of depending on other people.

    Well done, sir.

    I really like this.

  • 12 years ago

    by NobodyKnowsItButMe

    A poem written in very simple language and easily understandable...packed with meaning! Well done!

  • 11 years ago

    by dalllllal

    Well done your poems are short but more meaningful that even the longest ones I loved this