Toxic Circles

by Baby Rainbow   Dec 9, 2012


Twenty eight small white circles,
sleeping peacefully in
the palm of my hand.
Disturbed and emptied
from the shelter of the brown
plastic bottle they called home.
Desperate thoughts race hurriedly
across my spinning mind
like surges of high voltage electricity.
Twenty eight swallows of tainted water
to flush them into my system
and release their toxic freedom.
Twenty eight small white circles
sleeping peacefully in the pit
of my nerve churning stomach.
Twenty eight small white circles,
disintegrating into melted powder
and seeping through my poisoned veins.
Twenty eight minutes to say goodbye
before they reach my unrepairable heart
and stop its silent beat.

    report violation
1


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Latest Comments

  • 12 years ago

    by Khalid M Darwish

    Sorrowful piece mixed with darkness. This is unique. I loved the repetition of the number 28 in many faces throughout the poem. Great work.

  • 12 years ago

    by Khalid M Darwish

    Sorrowful piece mixed with darkness. This is unique. I loved the repetition of the number 28 in many faces throughout the poem. Great work.

  • 12 years ago

    by Maple Tree

    You took the dark side of ending a life... and created a beautiful piece.. the light and creativity of this piece is breathtaking..

    Saffie- you have the ability to share your darkness and thoughts and wrap them into a poem, so that reader, who may be lost in darkness, can relate... and that is touching another soul through poetry.. and its a beautiful thing..

    making the reader feel they are not alone.. I'm proud of you and this is one reason why I say breathtaking...

  • 12 years ago

    by Thomas

    Great imagery to describe a suicide attempt.

    I hope this was not based on personal experience because suicide is never a solution.
    A great saying goes like this: "Everything is ok in the end, if it's not ok then it's not the end."

    Very well written piece.

  • 12 years ago

    by Wild flower

    This is a really sad poem, the repetition of twenty eight made your tone sadder, which made the poem powerful. :)

    The thought of committing suicide comes after something bad happening to someone. I hope all is good with you, and I hope this poem is just an idea that popped to your mind

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