This poem is fantastic, it truly reminds me of the story of Romeo and Juliet. Many people have heard or know about timeless love stories but are not capable of creating one like the one you have created.

Honestly many relationships fail due to a lack of communication which is really sad, because only through honesty and communication we gain the ability to love a person how they need and want us to love them.

I read over this poem more than once and honestly I can't pick a favorite stanza so I telling you, you've created a sad love story better than those create for tv.

Tonight, Darling...
I will glare into our killers eyes,
and await for my death with pride -
we will be together again
in a place where temperature does not exist.

^^Wow. I love this ending, it's brilliant and powerful and has so much emotion in it. It shows a lot of strength and confidence in a way. I also love the use of Darling (:

If only I could have blow-torched the igloo
surrounding my Siberian heart -
before it was too late.

^^I feel like it gets sadder and sadder as it progresses, that you become more hopeless but by the ending you've had it and decided to be strong, I like the transition from this stanza to the last one.

If only I would have communicated more,
you wouldn't have had doubts -
you would have known you were perfect
in every single way.

^^Ah communication is one of the most important things which is obvious in how you worded this. I love how sweet the last line is, this is definitely a bittersweet love story like the other comment suggests.

If only I would have listened closer,
I would have understood your mumbles of insecurities -
you were afraid I didn't love you anymore.

^^Again, I love how it ties in to the next stanza, the things that make or break a relationship. I feel like lack of communication and listening has to do with lack of trust. Like there is fear of communication and letting someone inside to know the real you, that person that you are afraid to reveal because is you expose your vulnerability not only can your heart get broken but even your spirit. Someone could completely destroy you. Sorry to ramble. O.o

While I await my new future,
I will dwell on every single "if only",
preparing myself for a new challenge,
to be a better lover in our afterlife.

^^I like the idea of if only. I find myself thinking that quite often and find it to be a destructive question. This is an interesting stanza.

I can't bear to blow gusts of warmth
into our conjoined palms,
it will detach us -
forever.

^^Love this. It's very artistic.

Your poor, chapped lips -
they flake, crumble and peel
while your once sweltering saliva
turn into icicles.

^^A very sad image, but beautifully written. I believe that this is a strong first stanza, it definitely drew me into keep reading.

Sorry for a long, somewhat rambling comment, I may have gotten a little carried away with my thoughts. I love how beautifully, heartbreaking this poem is to sum everything up. From the wording to the style to the meaning. Everything about this is well done. I'm psyched to see your round 2 poem.

Hi

You have created a poem filled with pictures and contraditive information about life and humans.
I love you way to create each sentense in a tight form

Your poor, chapped lips -
they flake, crumble and peel
while your once sweltering saliva
turn into icicles.

- the change of temperature here indicated the idea of loss or death. A drastic change which means the poem will deep and I know I will be drawn in to the story.

I can't bear to blow gusts of warmth
into our conjoined palms,
it will detach us -
forever.

- This gives me the further idea of the relationship being two lovers who are battling with a rough patch and they are hanging by a thread. I love the idea of heating soemthing up having the opposite affect than what was intended.

While I await my new future,
I will dwell on every single "if only",
preparing myself for a new challenge,
to be a better lover in our afterlife.

- this is such a sad emotion of regret and how we ponder everything we done and all the things we didn't do either. The way you mention after life shows how raw the pain is, that you only wish when you die you will become better.

If only I would have listened closer,
I would have understood your mumbles of insecurities -
you were afraid I didn't love you anymore.

- this can be compared to most relationships, communicating and understanding are so important between two people. I think sometimes if things are not said we do not hear them, even though they can be just as loud as words spoken. It is so sad to think of someone feeling unloved in a relationship but the other person does not know this until it becomes too late.

If only I would have communicated more,
you wouldn't have had doubts -
you would have known you were perfect
in every single way.

- this is so touching because while they felt one way, you clearly felt the opposite and thought they were perfect and loved them very much. It shows you wish you had changed things and said this more to them instead of maybe just thinking it and assuming they would know.

If only I could have blow-torched the igloo
surrounding my Siberian heart -
before it was too late.

- such powerful description and good metaphor of the igloo. Very deep regret here because your heart already knows it is too late to turn back time and fix the problem.

Tonight, Darling...
I will glare into our killers eyes,
and await for my death with pride -
we will be together again
in a place where temperature does not exist.

- amazing ending, love the idea that without the temperature there would be no danger for your relationship. It is also very sad that these two do not have the chance to fix things. Even the hope at the end, of being together again seems very faint like you do not know whether to believe in this or not.

Fantastic poem, well done xx

I love this! While it would be sad to witness such a tragic love story, it is beautifully translated and forces you to stay along for the ride. You don't want to look, because you know how it's going to end, but you have to see it through, anyway. Those kinds of stories are the ones that stay with me for a long time. Great job!

Hannah, this is one of your best , your creativity is in a league of its own , everything you write hits home with such raw power I have to say I read this about 5 times
And the ending line was the icing on the cake ,

You are unbelievable !!

Added to my favs

I absolutly loved this... I envy people with talent as beautiful as this

This poem, clearly, has a lot of emotion in it. it portrays a lot of sadness, and it does so in a way that flows well enough, and is easy enough to read.

that said a couple of the metaphors were a little awkward. "siberian heart" with the part about melting an igloo with blow torch. the use of temperature as a metaphor for conflict and emotion in this way is interesting, and definitely food for thought but it shifts from being a tool in one passage to being an antagonist in the next, and siberian hearts and igloos and blowtorches seem almost too outlandish for a poem with a sad tone such as this.

lastly the poem focuses very heavily on "I" and "you" and never strays very far away from the narrator or the subject, without really defining the narrator or the subject. i think, over all, this poem could stand a little bit of revision and work, but shows great promise.

If only I would have communicated more,
you wouldn't have had doubts -
you would have known you were perfect
in every single way.

^That is a great stanza. It expresses the heartbreak of regret and what would have been if the speaker had changed something. The things it would've changed, the doubts, the insecurity of the lover, are such sad spots, that it makes my stomach drop. It hits home for the girls reading this in the perspective of the speaker's significant other.

Again, I'm a fan! c:

I love it.
This was beautiful.
Keep up the good work.