So You Asked Me What It's Like?

It's kind of hard to describe what it's like.
So I need you to imagine something.

Imagine going to the beach.
And that you're blindfolded.
And you walk in the water.

You don't stop.
You just keep walking.
You have no idea where you're going.

Just that you're going deeper.
That's what the build-up to cutting feels like.

You don't know where you're going.
You're just so depressed.
That it's literally just blinded you.

Just keep walking into the water.
Going deeper and deeper still.
Until you start to drown.

And there's nothing you can do about it.

You want air.
You want relief.

And you don't want to drown anymore.

Now imagine.
Someone pulling you up.
To the surface of the water.

Imagine the sense of relief you'd feel.
Because that's what cutting is, relief.

It's a relief from all of the pain.
That you've basically been drowning in.

It's a relief from all those feeling.
That you're not good enough.

That you're never good enough.

Relief from bullies.
Relief from not looking societies fcked up.
Relief from unachievable idea of 'perfect'.
Relief from all of your insecurities.

You may find the thought of cutting,
And harming yourself disgusting.
And might never understand why people do it,

But you're drowning.
You need saving.

You need to be pulled.
You need to be at the surface.

You need some air.
You need relief.

So you asked me what self-harm is like?
For me, it's a relief from life, to be honest.

(C.) NAC. Natasha ~