Comments : The Zoo

  • 11 years ago

    by Chelsey

    Love love love this...Firstly, I just love zoos...my mom and I go to them in every state we visit...but EVERY time I'm there, I always think of how small the habitats are and I cant stand it......The zoo here in my city is one of the top in the country. They are always expanding room for them to roam....The zoo I was most disappointed with was the San Diego zoo...Supposed to be the top zoo there is, variety wise, there were a TON of animals I've never seen, but they had 4 elephants crunched into this small habitat probably as big as your house....I hate that.....

    I love this poem seriously...You can take anything and create a masterpiece...love the use of forefathers, makes ya look at the animals differently..like they are human..like the treatment is unfair...

    youre awesome

  • 11 years ago

    by Tara Kay

    :) Just Beautiful...I want to comment properly on this piece because it gives me a lot of different images when reading and it deserves the praise :)

    Harsh winters smother
    realization of the caged ones.

    ^^I immediately felt a touch of sorrow here, and it reminded me of animals in cages, like bears made to dance and all that horrible cruel stuff that happens to animals...and the whole harsh winters thing, It is bitter here and it made me feel cold for a moment

    Reflecting on a time of freedom,
    their animal desires fade
    to dust, upon a morning
    when the sun has risen on
    the wild, but not for
    captured souls.

    ^^Here I thought of people falsely imprisoned, and how dark and lonely it must be to be innocent but caged up, though by the title, I know it is about animals in a zoo

    Feeding on eyes of
    onlookers, spirits
    fade..

    ^^This could relate to all animals and people, seeing things from the inside and having no hope of freedom, just a powerful part here

    slipping away in the
    harsh, dark of night.

    Joining the walk of
    forefathers before them,
    the journey begins
    in another life, beyond
    the steel bars that mark
    the fate of the lost....

    ^^Then I thought of death here, and it was really heartbreaking, animals starved, people committing suicide in prison...

    although this was a nature piece, and was talking about zoo's and the animals in a zoo... it had many different outlooks that it could portray

    just beautiful and sad, yet the faith and the love at the end...

    just a great piece

  • 11 years ago

    by Ares

    Amazing poem! I love the sense of broken pride yet a some kind of steel-willed courage that the last stanzas brought out. The pace is spot-on and the imagery was flawless. I really was able to form a picture in my mind quickly and that´s proof of a very good poem! First 5-rating of the day! Awesome job!

    Ares

  • 11 years ago

    by Baby Rainbow

    I really like how you have captured the innocence here and it is like this poem is fighting for them and speaking for them, like you are making a stand for the ones who cannot speak for themselves.

    Harsh winters represent coldness and loud storms and fear, which is what it feels like to be trapped in a cage - for animal or human. This is why I like the poem, it can be read as the animals in the zoo, or for deeper thoughts it can be read as innocent humans who are suffering in the same way.

    Reflecting on a time of freedom,
    their animal desires fade
    to dust, upon a morning
    when the sun has risen on
    the wild, but not for
    captured souls.

    - this shows that their hope is running out and they begin to lose strength to carry on. They will soon just give in to being in the cage and accept there is nothing more from them. This is such a sad thought because at one time they had so much other hopes of what life would be for them and yet someone else takes that away from them. This situatioin can be signed to many people or things. The main point from it though is the dying of hope and how it slowly kills the soul when they do not have the freedom we were meant to have.

    Feeding on eyes of
    onlookers, spirits
    fade..

    -I took from this the lack of provacy. How everything you do is seen and judged by others and there is nothing you can hide from the nosy eyes. It is so touching to think of fading spirits, that inside their true being is slipping away. so sad.

    The ending is very powerful because it is them letting go of what has been their torture, in order to be on the other side hoping that it will be better than the last. This point of emotion is so severe because it shows that you get to a point where nothing seems worse and you feel you have nothing to lose.

    Very emotional and powerful poem, was not expecting this at all when I read your title and found it to be this deep. Excellent job of surprise. xx