Broken Flowers

Liz, as you have probably noticed I am digging through your older stuff as well as other peoples and I am glad to say I came across this because it's unlike the other stuff of yours I have read before and its a rhyming piece and I like those alot but you do it so smoothly and it reads that way too. This is quite interesting to me as well and I think the title fits perfectly to the content though I wondered why you used broken to describe the flowers then I read the piece about 3 times and thought right.. The flowers seem to be mirroring how this lady feels though maybe I'm wrong.

1/ I love the imagery you set out here of this woman holding these flowers (no doubt how she wish men would treat her with) care and delicacy and these flowers holding her story within them and only she truly understand the stories if they were to be told.

2/ ok, this is interesting because anyone would love to hear those 3 little words but its like this woman doesn't as her heart cries and her flowers break and it leads me asking myself why and I think its because this lady has had more than her fair share of heartache therefore, mistrusting or that she knows her lover to be lying about loving her.

3/ The imagery is once again unique and imaginative because this lady, hurt and no doubt filled with feelings of mistrust, loneliness and hurt is keeping hold of these stems that are now not flowers anymore in hope (I feel) that her love and care will being them back to life abit like the relationship she's in. She holds onto it in hope that things will turn out right but unfortunately these kinds of relationships always end badly. Anyway, as she becomes sad the flowers mirror her emotion thus shedding more petals, beginning to feel empty like her.

4/ This is an absolutely stunning end and as Hellon said you dont really give anything away as to why this situation has arisen though many of us could probably tell. Words are always so powerful especially deceitful ones as it takes a lifetime to build trust yet a second to break it.

Em

I love the vagueness of this write. Plainly the person has been hurt in the past but you don't tell us exactly why and that is intriguing for the reader...like that idea.

I think the petals start off as hope but when they begin to die with each lie told she doesn't trust anyone now and yet she still holds onto the stems...perhaps still afraid to let go. As I said...you left the reader to guess a lot in this piece and I really enjoyed it although, I'm probably totally off the mark :)

In the first stanza you can feel the love this person has for the flowers because she is the only one that can read into the story. Like they are part of her world and she theirs. I love the describing words of delicate and care they fit together so well and it tells the reader about this person's personality. That she is a caring and loving soul who might have been hurt in the past but is willing to keep going. She is one of the flowers she carries. So fragile but beautiful and rich with colours in the depths of her soul.

She doesn't love this person anymore and the flowers are connected with her heart and when she feels sad they wither and fall apart. Though she is hurt inside which is clear she still keeps walking and staying strong for her friends in the flowers. I love that she grows more into depression and the flowers are her. At least a strong symbol of her. People can have such a connection with someone that they feel their pain just as much. I kinda like the vagueness though as you leave the teader guessing why she is sad.

I love the ending because deep inside again is black like the flowers in her hands. But we don't know why haha. It seems every word that her love speaks is a lie and her heart is breaking apart like you written so well the flowers. Overall a great poem. 5

I really liked this and your rhyming was fantastic.

I liked the metaphor you used . the end was my favorite part. sometimes lies are helpful to survive