by Wild flower
This is so sad and touching. |
by L
The black sun rising... sort of like an Eclipse? |
by average thoughts
Wow, saffie.. |
by Meme
I have always hated sunsets, they just give me this strong sense of depression so when I read your piece I could totally get to that place. The images you penned made me picture a woman feeling too lonely in a big world... It really broke my heart |
by Amreen
Wow Saffie ... this is an amazing poem ! |
by Lostlove1
Sometimes words don't come after I read a poem and this is one of those times...which with me, is a good thing. Your words paint the scene perfectly and I felt this sadness and pain. Good luck contest wise :) |
by Tara Kay
I'm not even going to attempt to convey my thoughts on this piece...they are travelling at a speed to fast to process... |
by Xanthe
I don't really know how to comment on pieces like this. I'll just say it's written beautifully, and that it's completely relatable for me. |
First of all, congrats on your win, Saffie! It's truly deserved... this is an amazing piece. |
Everyone has said enough, all I'm gonna say is this is your best by far, |
by shakil ahmed
I am unable to recollect how love tastes like. Love poem hardly touches my heart. But due to sheer beauty of the poem i cant help relishing it. Keep up! |
It really isn't easy to write when one is in pain and I take my hat off to you for bringing across such a complete sense of loss. |
by Darren
We start with an amazing analogy, the realisation that you will never see this person again hits, in tune with the sun setting. Such a sad start, but a clever start. It is a warning that this poem is deeper than it first appears. |
by Redangelwings
This is such a beautiful poem so full of emotion and raw sadness. I can understand this so much. You lost someone close to you and you did such a wonderful job putting your feelings into a poem. Kneeling beside your grave. I understand this well. Its not great but its one way you move on and cope. I love the first lines though because the sun goes down means night comes out and you feel very lonely and you want to feel comfort. Depression is the night here I feel. I love the colors decribing the city. It seems so small to where you are. It seemed blue yesterday because you were happy then! It's crazy how one thing can change your moods. |
by HOLLYBXBE
You are one of the most amazing writers I have ever met! You paint such imagery and you can feel every emotion with what you write. This poem is really heartbreaking to me cuz I recently had to put my dog down after 12 years she was my best friend and my family and I buried her in our yard and I bought a heart shaped stone for her grave.. I laid there and cried on her stone with flowers in my hand just wishing to turn back time. Reading this I found myself crying. Someday I hope to aspire to write like you. (: |
by Saturos
Memories of a person lost, a saga, can be hard to let go of, but what a beautiful way of expressing such a happening. Thank you for sharing. |
by Midnight Sky
Long but you told a good story that is the important thing |
An Irreplaceable write, beautiful in darkness and wrought with the purest despair. I like the centralized idea the ends up uniting the poem "the black sun" incorporating this validates the rest of the write into one beautiful package. |
This is a very sad and so lovely written and you have turned all your emotions in a beautiful poem. I love it |
Well deserved for a win .CONGRATS. |