by Khalid M Darwish Feb 14, 2013
category :
Life, society /
about society
We erect the world |
by Rusheena
I love the message, but I got a little lost on the second and fourth lines. I think "collapse" should have a "s" on the end. I know you were trying to keep the syllable count, but you could try "it collapses then erects". For the fourth line, you could try: "The wise are those who enjoy". Just a suggestion, but I still really liked it. |
by xXx Eternal PainxXx
Lol cute and small! :) 5/5 |