Comments : Ladybirds (haiku)

  • 11 years ago

    by Mohan

    Wow! this is a fantastic haiku.

  • 11 years ago

    by Hellon

    I absolutely love this! I have an affiliation with ladybirds to start with and your title just drew me in and....how glad I am that I found this treasure.

    Just the thought of a ladybird walking the trail of the lines on the palm of you hand was very appealing to me...which one would it take...would it change it's mind (perhaps not liking what it saw in the future) and take another path? Forgetting it's wings was a great ending...it was so engrossed in your future it wanted to explore some more!

    Absolutely adored this one Colm...very well done :)

  • 11 years ago

    by Britt

    Fortune wrinkled.. that just sounds so amazing. I'm assuming ladybirds are like ladybugs? I've never heard them called ladybirds, so that's the only thing I can think of.

    Such a beautiful tale. Are they forgetting their wings because they're involved in reading your future, or because they are moving ahead and moving on from their past? So much thought from such a small piece, I love it!

  • 11 years ago

    by Darren

    Might be a eyebrow raising choice for a 10 pointer but a haiku is a poem. Not only is a poem when written as well as this it turns into a huge slice of a poem. Each line works wonders with its initial imagery and its deeper meanings. We begin with the thought that something as brightly colored and as obvious as a ladybird would even attempt to tiptoe. Yet what I believe the author could be saying is this, Maybe it is over cautious of its own beauty, has society now begun to tun against the beautiful? Does it fear jealously and a backlash? Following this train of thought we are taken away from ladybirds. We move into line two, the obsession in society to know what is around the corner. The want now culture. This is how it reads to me. Then the final line is the twist. Yes as a nature piece ladybirds at times seem too lazy to fly. Yet as a social piece I am wondering, is the author suggesting that people forget their potential? Do the beautiful become trapped by their own design?
    This poem is so deep and worthy of 10 points. A great Haiku is so much more than 17 syllables.