This is deeper then deep , but obviously I know
This story so well. I think this piece is
Finally the words that couldn't surpass your
Lips , one thing in life I've learnt

Now that you have shared your pain
You can escape from the shackles

Well penned indeed

Wow, this is so powerful and just worded very well. It tells a story of loss and how the outcome has affected your life and your emotions. When suicide is looking better than life, we can clearly imagine how strong the pain is.

You have taken a simple moment in time, an event of loss that we can all relate to, then you have worded it in a way that really reaches out and touches the reader.

My only thing i don't like ( just my opinion ) is the layout, I just prefer a poem to be more spaced out into stanza's but that is just my opinion as I often am attracted to poetry through the shape or the look of it before I read the words.

Well done on an emotional write. Very eye catching title too!

Wow, this is heartbreaking and such a touching piece, I don't know what to say, I am sorry for your loss and in time it won't hurt as bad as it does now and I know it feels as if you can make it all go away by ending your own life, but that's not the answer and I think you know that... and I hope that by writing this piece and sharing your pain with us that it will help you, even if in the smallest way... baby steps, one day at a time, keep writing, keep expressing...

Very nice write :) I like it a lot

@.@!!!

Wowsers!!!

Great write kiddo, I'm glad you have a way to vent :)

I loved this . totally awesome